Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire!
by Stephen Phillips
missiles missiles missiles

Welcome to the snow-white paradise that is Davos--home to some of the best skiing in Europe, playground of the rich and famous, and for this week only, the place to be seen if you're one of the planet's movers and shakers.

Yes, folks ,this week Davos plays host to the World Economic Forum, an annual event that sees politicians rubbing shoulders with entrepreneurs and business leaders.  It's a chance for old friends to catch up on gossip while sitting around roaring log fires, eating fondue and toblerone, and discussing new and exciting ways to carve up the planet's dwindling resources and screw the little man.

Included in this bunch of dubious do-gooders is none other than the U.S. administration's answer to ‘Where’s Waldo,’ Mr. Dick Cheney.

So, Dick, what's new in the War on Terror?

Well, according to the man in the know, it’s going really well.   But the fact of the matter is that the death toll among  GIs continues to rise, now surpassing 500--not good, considering that hostilities are supposed to be over.  (Maybe someone should have told the Iraqis that the ball game finished last year.)

But never mind.  A few casualties here and there will not detract from the real mission, finding those elusive WMDs.   Remember those vile and nasty things, said to pose an imminent threat to peace and security the world over?  “We know that Saddam has them, as we have credible intelligence” was the mantra repeated over and over again by both G.W. and Tony Blair.  There is only one tiny problem:  nobody seems to know where they are.

This doesn’t bode well for the folks who led us into the war in the first place.  The public at large might be pretty gullible some of the time, but on the whole we aren’t completely stupid.

What has exacerbated the problem is that last week, Mr. Peter Kay, the head of the team appointed by the U.S .government to seek out Iraqi WMDs, resigned, saying that he did not believe Saddam had a weapons program, and probably had not had one in place since about 1991.

Oops.  That might be a little embarrassing to George, Donny Rumsfeld, and Dicky Boy--especially coming on the heels of what the head of the United Nations inspection team, Dr. Hans Blix, said last year about the lack of any discernable WMD program then in place in Iraq.

Anyway, back to Davos and Dick’s speech to the faithful:

Try as he might to sound confident and make it smell oh-so-sweet, Cheney looked like a man under pressure--especially when the subject of Halliburton and kickbacks was bought up.  Oh dear, things were not looking so peachy for our boy Dick.   How could he possibly weasel his way out of this one?

Well, you have to give the guy some credit:   he postured and gesticulated, trying very hard to sound like a used car salesman whose last sale of the day was a 1976 Ford Pinto with 150,000 miles on the clock.

But alas, all was in vain.  A few days later his partner in crime, Colin Powell, came out in public to say that he also thought it would prove very difficult to find Saddam’s alleged weapons.

At this point, there is only one thing thing that is appropiate to say to Dicky Boy, Donny and Dubya:

“LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE!!!!”

Let's just hope that when election time rolls around, the public will have the courage to vote these lying clowns out of office.

(Probably not.  But hope springs eternal.)